I will ask you to say a few words, he said.My brain went into panic mode; images of baby birds leaving the nest popped in. But I\’m no baby, my thoughts raged back. I\’m a woman on a journey. I stood before the congregation after the pastor had announced that I was leaving and after he handed me the mic, I babbled on about a few things: the 44-mile one-way trip that I had to do each time I came to service, the fact that the church was not in my neighborhood, the fact that I needed to serve in my community, and that my heartbeat area of service is homeless ministries (of which this particular town and congregation had no real understanding of) … I expressed my appreciation for their love and care over the years. I said I\’d visit.I think I did okay.Until I cried.It couldn\’t be helped.Change is difficult, but this transition was not as difficult as I thought it would be. I\’d written a while ago about my existential moment and now this one at least has come to its end. The best part was that I was able to feel part of the new ministry, here in my locale (two miles from my front door, to be precise), before having left the former one. Having a new church home that I could call such, prior to walking out that door for the last time, made it hurt less.Despite the anguish over the issues, I care for the people there. I will miss many whose faces I saw each week. But my heart is fully happy as I prepare to go forward into the next chapter …And sometimes, change ain\’t so bad.
No one could have said it more eloquently or beautifully; change hurts but it also can make way for peace of mind and strength. And for passing along this wisdom (as well as your being a good human being and fellow writer!), I wish you continued healing on the existential whatchamacalit that is life, AR.
<3 Thank you!!